How I deal with dissonance. Only when I take it personally. It is hard not to make some sort of agreement with myself that I am defective in some way. I try to sweep house. These negatives seem to resist my power broom. Now I'm talking in riddles. I miss having priesthood blessings. I know that at several times in my life those blessings restored my sense of balance and perspective. One of the many respected gifts of the spirit on earth. My ability to give and receive comfort seems greatly diminished in this choice of mind. It would stand to reason that a priesthood blessing could bring much needed solace. I have heard that kind words also cheer the heart. There is enough pain in mortality to warrant the need for some kind of reprieve.
Truly, without the song of a sad heart there would be no contrast against which to recognize the gladder tones of life. And yet sadness droning on too long makes for a dreary and impossible melody unless woven in again at last with many measures of gladness. How does one decide when the melody is too burdened and needs to change? How does one lift the experiences that plunk to the bottom of our hearts? And when one has allowed the sadness to drone on and on, how does one believe that it is not a mistake?
Eckhart Tolle talks about the spiritual nature of flowers. That the essence of a flower draws us in immediately. It is not the form, but the essence, the spirit that enlightens and gladdens our heart. And yet the flower is certainly different than the seed and so to become itself, it must needs have changed. Have you ever heard the growing pains of a flower? Once I wrote a paper for a music class. As I walked outside I was drawn to consider music of the daffodils. Did they have voices? Did they sing? Did they sing playfully? Did they lament? I guess because they looked so strong and yellow I decided that they must be always singing and began to wish that I had the ears to hear them. But I hadn't considered until now the music of their growing. What is music? Why does it provide balance to our spirit and do we consider the less obvious places it plays for us. Through nature, touch and kind words. Okay, I guess I will go now and construct the much needed reprieve. And try to understand that neither pain nor joy are a mistake or to be avoided, but blended and harmonized. Now there's a project for all of us.
Easter 2026
1 day ago
2 comments:
Yes! Blending together continually, they thread the fabric of life. In and out, up and down, opposites attracting and growing pains . . . this was a very insightful post - thank you for putting these words down - and I hope that I can find things to do for/with you that can show you how wonderful my life is because you're in it . . . I ask "if there's anything I can do," and you always say no! So I'll have to think of some things myself :) I love you so much, Mom.
Maybe I shouldn't butt in here, but...there are so many other ways to find peace and solace and knowledge apart from priesthood blessing. I know because I have had to find those places myself. Most of them come from reading, studying, questioning, talking, communicating, and thinking, thinking, thinking...I do remember the peace of mind I found from some priesthood blessings, but have been lucky enough to find peace in other places. Not saying you should or have to do that, but exploring brings us many ways, places, and people who can provide some of that same mindset and sense of well-being. It's a difficult path to take, but one that can be very gratifying. I hope you come to a place of balance and peace of mind for YOU, Emily. I feel that is what you are seeking and you are working hard to find that. It's there. It's just in a slightly different place for each of us. You'll get there.
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